Follow Up About Being “Nice”

Never deny your instincts to “be nice” to someone if you sense danger…was the message on The Oprah Winfrey show yesterday (which I saw during my workout).

I thought it was fascinating to hear the expert on the show, Gavin De Becker, author of the book, Gift of Fear, say that perpetrators rarely get the best of a woman who isn’t swayed by the external pressure to be nice.

Also, I appreciated the author’s suggestions on how to keep your kids safe. I recently learned that a neighbor’s daughter was nearly molested by a friend of their family.

It’s always shocking and scary to learn something like this, but I think what all parents want and need to know is how to prevent it from happening in the first place.

So, let’s all read this article.

This guy is really sharp. I would echo Oprah’s recommendation that all women read his book and give it to their daughters, especially if they are going to college or leaving home.

I was surprised to hear him say that restraining orders often don’t work well and can exacerbate violence in many circumstances.

This seemed like the beginning of an important discussion about and among women.

Food for thought, mamas. It gets me through my workout!


1 Response to “Follow Up About Being “Nice””

  1. 1 Kelli February 1, 2008 at 11:46 am

    Thanks so much for that Oprah article!

    I like what he said about “strangers.” I remember reading when that little boyscout was lost at his camp, when the rescue crew came by to search for him, he hid because his mom had always taught him not to talk to strangers.

    I also know the story of a woman who went to help a little girl who was lost at the zoo. When the woman approached to help the little girl to help her find her mom and the girl cried harder and harder. The woman didn’t know what was wrong. Finally, her son said, “Mom, you are stranger her parents warned her about!”

    Sometimes, we need to reach out to people we don’t know. And I like what he said about intuition and listening to that. I have always told my daughter, if you are lost and need help, look for a mom with kids to ask for help. She will definitely help you find me (as I’m sure she probably isn’t looking for anymore kids of her own!) 😉

    Anyway, great article. I really appreciated you posting it.


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